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MENTAL HEALTH

Holding Anxiety Gently

2.26.24

Holding Anxiety Gently Expectations What’s the first thought that comes to mind when you wake up in the morning? Is it an anxious thought—maybe about all the things you should do today? Or maybe you’re setting expectations for yourself about what your day should look like? As soon as you notice your anxiety, what do you do? Do you start dreading the day and wonder whether your anxiety will ever subside? Have you noticed how the word expectation implies rigidity? When we place high or unrealistic expectations on ourselves, whether emotionally, physically, or even just about what we think we should accomplish today, our emotional well-being suffers. Now, that’s not to say you don’t need to have goals and dreams about your career

Growing Gratitude with Gratitude Pie Despite Your OCD!

11.10.23

By Kathleen Ririe Ever since I was little, pie has been my most anticipated part of the Thanksgiving feast. Pie and Thanksgiving go hand-in-hand. In fact, it is documented that pumpkin pie became a holiday staple beginning at the Pilgrim’s second Thanksgiving in 1623. In 2022 alone, 50 million pumpkin pies were purchased for Thanksgiving. Clearly, we have nailed it on the pie production scale, but how are we doing on the gratitude production scale? A recent Gallup poll reported that since 2020 the percentage of Americans who report being “very satisfied” with their personal life has dropped from 65% in 2020 to only 50% in 2023 (Gallup, January 2-22, 2023). Why has satisfaction declined so much and how can we reverse that in our own

Six Signs You Might Have Religious Scrupulosity

8.10.23

“Why can’t I get rid of these horrific thoughts? I’m supposed to have pure thoughts according to my faith. Will God ever forgive me?” Jon’s incessant thoughts were evoking extreme anxiety, doubt, and guilt in his daily life. He would excessively pray to ask for forgiveness. When the unwanted and unpleasant thoughts would show up, he would try to replace them by singing or repeating verses from his holy books. When he chose to confess his perceived sins, his religious leader told Jon that he had not sinned and to not worry about those thoughts. The faith leader reassured him by telling him that he was a good person. Despite his faith leader’s reassurance, Jon’s thoughts kept coming back. Jon blamed himself. He fe

In Your Darkest Times…

8.4.23

In your darkest times… Stay hopeful. Stay faithful. Even when you think God is not there. God is there and your scrupulous mind might just be getting in the way. Remember that your scrupulous mind is not in charge of your life or what you choose to do and believe. You are imperfectly good and God loves you unconditionally. You are enough. Keep the hope!

Connect to the Here and Now

7.31.23

Fears about the Present Moment Like many, you may be scared to pay attention to the present moment. It may feel impossible. This is normal as this is a new experience. Few are those who can naturally notice their attention drifting and softly bring it back to what is going on in the present. Lucky them! Most people’s minds are constantly drifting, and that’s okay. In Imperfectly Good I share several exercises to help you connect to the present moment. Try them one at a time at your own pace, slowly working through all of them. Find the ones that you like and that make sense to you. These exercises will enhance your mental flexibility. You can use your senses to help you anchor/focus on the here and now. Notice what you see, sm

Why I wrote “Imperfectly Good”

4.5.23

Treating anxiety disorders and obsessive-compulsive disorder became personal for me years before I became a psychotherapist. Unbeknownst to my husband and me, our youngest son’s early childhood stubborn streaks were an indication of his anxiety challenges. By the time he was in elementary school, his “just so” behaviors were evident, but we hoped he would grow out of them. By middle school, we realized he needed professional help. Long story short, we literally “took the tour” around the different cities in our state in search of a therapist who knew how to treat anxiety disorders and OCD, to no avail. It wasn’t until our son was in his early twenties that he himself found a specialist from California. Our experience motivated me

How powerful is the urge to look back?

3.24.23

Looking back at historical monuments is interesting. Speculating how things came about can be fun. But is trying to make sense of a past event working out for you? Have you noticed where obsessing and ruminating takes you? An event from the past is history and a memory. It’s no longer a fact no matter how often you go back in time. You can learn to live in the present!

From Gratitude to Self-Compassion

11.21.22

Do you have a difficult time being kind to yourself? Loving yourself may not even feel like an option according to your anxious mind. It may say, “You don’t deserve love because….”  You probably can fill in the blank with many unhelpful statements your rule-making mind typically whispers each time you hear someone talk about self-compassion. As we grew up, we were influenced by many people. Words and teachings from our well-meaning parents, teachers, coaches, faith leaders, and society in general have influenced how we think about ourselves. Maybe you grew up hearing, “Good boys don’t cry. Good girls should be nice all the time. You’re not trying hard enough. You should know better!” The list goes on and on. Do you remember ho

Responding to Rumination

10.24.22

It has been said that fish don’t know they are swimming in water; they just swim in it naturally unaware of that fact. It has also been said that our thoughts are our water. Most of us are swimming in our thoughts and we are hardly even aware of it. It is our natural state. Would you agree that this is the case for you? The good news is that we can learn to notice our thoughts and recognize when we are actually ruminating and getting deeper in the rabbit hole or the OCD cycle (if you struggle with OCD). Keep in mind that recognizing and acknowledging one’s thoughts for what they are –thoughts– is not the same as ignoring, suppressing, or resisting them. Have you ever had the experience of being at the movie theatre or a special e

Is Rumination Getting You Stuck in the OCD Cycle?

9.16.22

Rumination is what cows do when they rechew their food (cud) to digest it. They spend about eight hours every day doing it. We humans also ruminate. We can spend minutes, hours and even days rechewing our thoughts, especially during times of distress. If you struggle with OCD, your external and internal experiences (e.g., thoughts, memories, feelings, and sensations) are magnified and more persevering during difficult moments, and rumination can lead you to become stuck in the OCD cycle. The OCD Cycle When you get triggered by anything (internally or externally), you will have an initial thought that evokes the obsessions. You may then feel overwhelmed with difficult internal experiences (e.g., thoughts, feelings, sensatio

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A guide to help you find relief and happiness in spite of religious or moral OCD (scrupulosity OCD). Learn more about Annabella Hagen's book.
Imperfectly Good - Book by Annabella Hagen

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