Hearing about gratitude and joy can sometimes deepen your feelings of gloom, especially if you’re facing emotional and mental health challenges. You may find yourself asking: “Why do others seem so happy? Why do they appear to manage life better than I do? Don’t they have their own struggles? Am I the only one feeling this way?” When grappling with issues like depression, anxiety, OCD, ADHD, perfectionism, or other conditions, it can be tough to focus on life’s positive aspects.

Although it may feel isolating, remember that you are not alone!

The stigma surrounding mental health issues persists, often making you feel like you’re alone in your challenges because few people discuss them openly—especially when unpleasant thoughts arise.

Take the example of Fabian, who had a successful career and seemed to have everything figured out. Yet, he suffered in silence whenever he was around others—not due to social anxiety, but because he struggled with OCD. As a teenager, he started experiencing distressing thoughts about potentially harming others, leading him to spend countless hours analyzing past actions to reassure himself that he hadn’t caused harm.

He often felt embarrassment and shame, convinced that sharing his thoughts would lead to judgment. So, he kept them bottled up.

If you are facing any mental health hardships, reach out to a mental health professional who understands your situation. They can guide you through evidence-based practices to help you lead a fulfilling life, even in the face of difficulties.

In the meantime, consider trying these activities, which research suggests can enhance your mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing.

Limit Your Smartphone Usage

Research shows that:

• Excessive phone use can lead to sleep disturbances, depression, anxiety, and stress. NCBI
• Unhealthy social media habits are associated with self-reported depression and anxiety. ScienceDirect
• Mobile phone use may be more closely linked to obsessive-compulsive disorder than to addiction. University of Arkansas
• Heavy reliance on smartphones or tablets can lead to OCD-like behavior when it disrupts daily routines and triggers panic or anxiety. PsychCentral
• People under stress may use their phones as a coping mechanism. NeuroscienceNews.com
• Factors like interpersonal sensitivity and time spent on phones can predict nomophobia, the fear of being without smart technology. ScienceDirect

Would you consider putting your phone aside when spending time with loved ones or engaging in activities that can bring you joy and empowerment? Take a moment to decide when to disconnect from your phone, allowing yourself to be present. Reflect on this experience, and continue to adjust your phone usage accordingly.

Connect with Loved Ones

As humans, we naturally crave connection and belonging. We want to be seen, cared for, and part of a community.¹ When we lack connection, loneliness can set in, bringing along other painful emotions. Though it might seem easier to isolate ourselves to avoid judgment, is this truly beneficial in the long run?

What does research reveal?

• Oxytocin, often called the love hormone, is released when parents feed their newborns while holding them close, strengthening their emotional bond. NHS.UK
• Touching or embracing friends and family also triggers oxytocin release. HarvardHealth
• Those who choose social isolation during stressful times tend to have higher oxytocin levels. APA
• The Harvard study on adult development (one of the longest-running studies on happiness) identified a significant link between happiness and close relationships. Personal connections provide mental and emotional stimulation, serving as natural mood boosters, while isolation can lead to a decline in one’s mood. Harvard Health Publishing
• Instead of isolating ourselves, we need human connection, especially during stressful moments. TedTalks
• When oxytocin is released, it leads us to seek support from friends and family. TedTalks

Ultimately, for oxytocin to work effectively, we must engage in social interactions. Our bodies release more oxytocin when we reach out for help or offer support to others. How to Make Stress Your Friend

Navigating mental and emotional challenges can be tough, but it’s important to practice patience with yourself. Make an effort to connect with others, even when you might not feel inclined to do so. Hold onto hope; you can do this!

Explore the Benefits of Gratitude

We’ve all heard wonderful things about the power of gratitude. Let’s briefly examine what research reveals about its impact.

• Recognizing the small aspects of our lives and cultivating gratitude for them can improve our awareness and perception. This practice can, in turn, help reduce stress, depression, and anxiety. APAPsycNet
• Practicing gratitude can lower stress and anxiety. One genuine act of gratitude can boost happiness by 10% and reduce depressive symptoms by 35%. However, these benefits may fade within three to six months, highlighting the importance of regular gratitude practices. Mental Health First Aid
• Vietnam War veterans who practiced daily gratitude experienced lower rates of post-traumatic stress disorder. ScienceDirect
• Gratitude and resilience lower the risk of suicidal thoughts by enhancing life’s sense of purpose. ScienceDirect

Start small:

• Would you consider being grateful for your amazing, though imperfect, human body and mind? What do they allow you to do? As you develop this gratitude, would you be willing to allow self-kindness as well? From Gratitude to Self-Compassion
• Find joy in simple moments: appreciate nature’s beauty; pay kindness forward when someone is kind to you; take a moment to genuinely feel gratitude instead of just saying “thank you.” Hardships, Growth, and Gratitude
• Everyone experiences emotional winters, yet when the clouds start to lift, would you take the time to appreciate the clarity and the lessons learned along the way? Each evening, pause to reflect on the people and moments that brightened your day. Document these reflections; it will aid you in recognizing the many blessings surrounding you. Gratitude in Adversity

This message is intended to inspire hope and remind you that you can make small strides to start moving forward. You don’t have to take my word for it. Be your own researcher! Explore whether these strategies can enhance your mood during the holiday season.

Reference

1. Hayes, S. C. (2019). A Liberated Mind: How to Pivot Toward What Matters. New York: Avery.

Photo by Dmitry Spravko on Unsplash