Mindset | Blog

Holding Anxiety Gently Expectations What’s the first thought that comes to mind when you wake up in the morning? Is it an anxious thought—maybe about all the things you should do today? Or maybe you’re setting expectations for yourself about what your day should look like? As soon as you notice your anxiety, what do you do? Do you start dreading the day and wonder whether your anxiety will ever subside? Have you noticed how the word expectation implies rigidity? When we place high or unrealistic expectations on ourselves, whether emotionally, physically, or even just about what we think we should accomplish today, our emotional well-being suffers. Now, that’s not to say you don’t need to have goals and dreams about your career

By Kathleen Ririe What is scrupulosity? Picture this- you’re out walking on a beautiful path through the woods. The air smells of fresh rain, the trees are extra lush and green, and as the morning light shines through the trees you are filled with a sense of aliveness. UNTIL. You notice a tiny, sharp rock has found its way into your shoe. You try to ignore it, but the more vigilantly you ignore it, the more obnoxious it becomes. No matter how carefully you step, you can’t avoid the rock in your shoe. Soon you become completely engrossed in noticing the pebble and can no longer enjoy anything else the forest has to offer you. The word scrupulous comes from the Latin word Scrupulum which means a small sharp stone (1), and like t

Sometimes treatment for OCD can feel like you are taking a life detour where fear of the unknown may feel overwhelming. Indeed, moving from avoidant and compulsive behaviors (private and public) to living a values-centered life can feel unfamiliar. You may be cautious and sometimes doubtful about your progress. The Following steps will help you navigate the unsure terrain as you trust the process: Maintain a curious mindset. During treatment for OCD (any theme), you’ll learn skills that will allow you to create new neural pathways. It takes time to change behavioral and mental habits.Your mind will want you to focus on the outcome each and every day. Notice and acknowledge that and then choose to maintain a curious mindset. Try

Fears about the Present Moment Like many, you may be scared to pay attention to the present moment. It may feel impossible. This is normal as this is a new experience. Few are those who can naturally notice their attention drifting and softly bring it back to what is going on in the present. Lucky them! Most people’s minds are constantly drifting, and that’s okay. In Imperfectly Good I share several exercises to help you connect to the present moment. Try them one at a time at your own pace, slowly working through all of them. Find the ones that you like and that make sense to you. These exercises will enhance your mental flexibility. You can use your senses to help you anchor/focus on the here and now. Notice what you see, sm

Carson’s self-evaluative thoughts didn’t seem to cease in his life. He was consumed with thoughts such as, “I’m so dumb! Did I eat something that contained alcohol? I’ve sinned” “I’m so despicable for having those impure thoughts!” “I don’t deserve salvation.” “I’m unworthy of God’s love!” Unfortunately, there are many others who also experience these types of thoughts when they struggle with scrupulosity OCD. The human mind’s main function (OCD or not) is to protect us when it perceives we are in danger. However, when you’ve made a “mistake” (believing you’ve sinned, though you haven’t), and start stressing about it, your mind can quickly come to the rescue. It may provide evaluative thoughts so you can do “better next time.” The q

Treating anxiety disorders and obsessive-compulsive disorder became personal for me years before I became a psychotherapist. Unbeknownst to my husband and me, our youngest son’s early childhood stubborn streaks were an indication of his anxiety challenges. By the time he was in elementary school, his “just so” behaviors were evident, but we hoped he would grow out of them. By middle school, we realized he needed professional help. Long story short, we literally “took the tour” around the different cities in our state in search of a therapist who knew how to treat anxiety disorders and OCD, to no avail. It wasn’t until our son was in his early twenties that he himself found a specialist from California. Our experience motivated me

Looking back at historical monuments is interesting. Speculating how things came about can be fun. But is trying to make sense of a past event working out for you? Have you noticed where obsessing and ruminating takes you? An event from the past is history and a memory. It’s no longer a fact no matter how often you go back in time. You can learn to live in the present!

How often do you avoid or opt out of situations because they cause anxiety, uncertainty, or other unpleasant emotions? Consider what may be on the other side of your fear. “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?” Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some

When unpleasant thoughts and feelings show up, it may seem like you don’t have a choice in how to respond, but you do! You can choose the most traveled road (the easy path and compulsive behaviors) or the one less traveled (psychological flexibility) path. The least traveled path will require more work, patience, and effort, AND it will make all the difference!

Is religious and/or moral anxiety getting in the way of you focusing of what’s important in your life? Learn how to respond to your intrusive thoughts and focus on the here and now! Is religious and/or moral anxiety getting in the way of you focusing of what’s important in your life? Learn how to respond to your intrusive thoughts and focus on the here and now!